Mental Health

 Throughout our lifetime, there are many moments which we describe as a roller-coaster ride owing to the numerous ups and downs that we see during that time. Such moments bring with them anxiety, anger, nervousness and whole mouthful of words. Fancy isn’t it? 

But, to everyone’s surprise, when we recall such moments later in life, we simply laugh and talk about it.

 What do you think is the reason of such an attitude transformation? 

Have you ever wondered that majority of us have brilliant problem solving skills when it comes to helping a friend in need but those same skills seem to vanish when we ourselves land in trouble.

 What do you think makes this happen? 

To both the questions put forth, let me try to give a probable explanation, 

The reason to all this is that in both these situations, we are able to analyze and understand the circumstances when we are the 3rd person because we know that our judgment will not be affecting us in any case because we are not someone in the position but someone who is just being the AUDIENCE. To make it more clear to you, look at the 1st scenario. When you are recalling the moments of past, you are the 3rd person while your past self is the 1st person to whom the ordeal had happened. So, no matter how big or small the problem was, we think that our ‘present self’ would have reacted in a better way than our ‘past self’. Similarly, while coming to rescue for a friend, we are again at the 3rd person while the friend himself is in the 1st one.

 As it has clearly started to reflect that our mind functions way better when we place ourselves in place of the 3rd person. This is because subconsciously we know, that in such a position, any of the advices or judgments we give won’t affect us directly and hence the ‘sense of fear’ stays in check. And when this happens, ultimately we tend to analyze the situation better 

Like in some sports, a lot of importance is given to the position of the referee or the umpire as they are the 3rd person viewers of the game and are capable of giving unbiased opinions. Applying the similar fundamental in our lives, when we ourselves are in crisis, we obviously try every way to justify everyone how correct we are because all that we do and say will affect us directly. But, keeping ourselves in the 3rd person, we would be able to weigh the pros and cons and give a more unbiased opinion.

 So, breathe a moment, let the thoughts in your mind flow. Slowly, think of the current situation you are in. Place yourself on the 3rd person. You might either imagine the same scenario with a friend or you can refer to your own self as the 1st person and the 3rd person. Calmly, try to think about the situation and let the judgements come forward. They might or might not be in your favor but hear yourself out. It’s not compulsory that all of us are correct in every situation. But, one must have the power to be able to accept the mistakes committed. And this moral realisation hits you only when you put yourself away from the situation and think as the third person. This is one way of ‘self-introspection’. 

When by efforts and patience, you learn this method of examining your own self, you tend to make fewer mistakes meanwhile lowering the reasons of failure because before taking a step, you now know how to analyse and decide. Also, you then develop the power of comprehending the reaction of the mass on the things you do because they will then be the 3rd person for you!